What's in a name?

I'm busy writing the sequel, or non-sequel, to Stan. It's set 25 years after Stan ended. What I need is names - character names. I could do the random-name-generator thing, or the favourite-rock-artist-name-combo thing, but I thought I might try something different.

Does anyone want their name used for a character? Please submit as replies to this post. There are, you will understand, some rules:

1. It must be your name, not some poor soul that you want to pick on, or embarrass;
2. So, following on from that;
3. It must be publishable;
4. No Bart Simpson phone-gag names;
5. I cannot guarantee that the character will match yours in any way, or indeed be nice - given that there aren't very many nice people in my books, it's very likely that they will not be nice - at all.
6. There is no reward, financial or otherwise, in having you name included, other than be able to point at it in the book and say "that's me" - if you dare own up to it.
7. The author's word (mine) is final.